I was reading Megan's blog and she said it was so nice to have things be normal. I thought, maybe it is possible. I have felt total upside down for a year now. I keep wondering if life will ever be like it used to be... get up exercise, eat and read scriptures with Steve, family prayer, read my own scriptures, pick up the house, do a little laundry, then whatever for that day. It literally has been more than a year since that has happened on a consistent basis. I have wondered if it is my imagination that it ever was that way, but I know it must have been because Steve and I read the whole Book of Mormon together, and almost all of the Doctrine and Covenants. We have been in the same spot in the Doctrine and Covenants for about 6 or 8 months now. Between family stuff, moving and remodeling, life has been crazy.
Remodeling is the most chaotic crazy thing on earth. We have had a hole starting at the garage floor up to the top of our ceiling in the kitchen for about 4-5 weeks or more now. We have had no back door from the house to the garage now for two days, it will be a week by the time we get a door. We have had men running around our house for the last 5 weeks. It seems pointless to vacuum, dust or sweep. There is sawdust, sheet rock dust and etc. everywhere. I could go on, but that is enough. It is making me crazy. For the last 8 weeks I have eaten really healthy and lost all the weight I had gained over the last 8 months. Over the last 3 days I think I gained at least a few pounds of that back. I just have lost it. I did almost nothing today but eat crap to put it bluntly.
I know it will be great when it is done, its just that we started moving in the first of November and the house has been a mess since we started moving in. I am ready for some order. One thing it has done for me is that I am so ready to get rid of excess stuff! I haven't been able to back my car up and even find the stuff because there is construction stuff in the way or trucks in the way. Oh well, I know waaa, waaa, poor me. I know I have TONS to be grateful for, its just getting to me.
love you all!!!
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Tired of Chaos
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9 comments:
The normalness will return, I promise you. I had the same wonders and here it is, even if it's a small moment. And I know we'll find a new normal after the baby is born, but that might take a few months- or more. You have had a crazy year, haven't you. Cancer, divorce, and moving. Each of those individually is a whammy, but all in a row? That just means you glorious spring ahead of you where everything will be wonderful again. When it comes, I don't know. But it will come. Love you Mom. I would love for you and grandma to visit. I want all the visitors I can get. I'm going to be lonely :(
Crazy how just a few things can throw life out of wack. I've felt that way since my mom had her stroke and then trying to get back into how life was before has been hard. It almost feels impossible. i just continue to plug along and do as many normal things as possible. When costruction ends, I am sure you will get it back. It always amazes me how much your chaotic physical environment can influence everything else.
I agree with Megan- CRAZY YEAR! Can you believe it's almost been a year since we found out about Amy's cancer? And pretty much everything else too! I'm sorry it's been so chaotic. I know it will get better. It has to! I love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hey Sharon!! Sorry for your chaos!! It has been crazy here but we are doing well. Kyle leaves for his mission in six days!!! And then they all fly out the door, right? I'll just know that even though the kids may be gone, chaos can still continue!! I'll have to get your email so I can send you a link to the blog. Love Carin
I hope things calm down for you soon!! On a side note can you let Megan know I just saw her invite in my email and now it won't let me join her blog it's expired! Can you please have her send me another one at kypratt@gmail.com THANKS!!
It has been a really hard time for us all and you have suffered a lot more than some of us. I think things will get back to normal, what ever that is and if and when you find it tell me so I can get it too. I love you and look forward to you getting your remodel finished so I can come over. Remodeling is the PITS I have been involved more times than I care to remember. It will get better Megan is right. Hugs and kisses
ok, first of all, I hate it when people say, "I know sorry i'm whining" I wish people would accept that it's ok to whine, and complain, we need to get it out before we lash out at someone we love, or do something stupid, so don't apologize for whining. AND- things will get back to normal eventually. You found out that your daughter has cancer, and your other daughter is getting a divorce from a CREEP (not just a divorce, but a divorce from an absolute creepo, that makes it even harder) and you moved, all at the same time!!!! and, you aren't imagining the normal life, you did have a more organized life before, adn it will come back again. i loev you
if aliese reads your blog- delete my above comment
Normal? Good luck with that. If you ever find it, let me know. I have no hope of normal. How's that, everybody. I have given up hoping for the impossible. I'm confident when everything calms down, something else will happen, like maybe several babies in a year, me getting married (hopefully), or something bad like a surgery or a death, or someone else becoming unemployed. What the heck is normal? That's what I want to know. Love you Mom. Whine anytime you want. I personally am a professional at it, and love fellow professionals.
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